How to find a man after God's heart
Ever since I was little, I've dreamt of sharing my life with a guy who loved God as much as I did. But over the years, it started to feel like a pipe dream. I couldn't find anyone who seemed to line up with my values. And sadly, I began to give up, rather easily, too. It seemed like no one around me felt the way I did about God, so I started to believe that I needed to settle. I needed to change. I had to be ok with people who weren't so on fire for the Lord. It's sad, but true. I strayed very far from where I wanted to be, because I was desperate for love. I was desperate for connection. I felt so alone. Without meaning to, I walked away from what I dreamed of since I was a little girl, but even more so, I walked away from the Lord.
I entertained relationships that were not God centered. A couple of the guys I dated were wonderful people with huge hearts. But in order to feel comfortable around them, I had to suppress my love for God. I had to act like God wasn't that big of a deal. Unfortunately, when we act like something for long enough, it becomes our truth. I really walked away from the Lord in my quest to "find love."
I tried finding guys who loved God! I gave it a good shot. I'd go out with them, but it would usually end in having scripture pushed at me and being told that we obviously weren't on the same page because some of our beliefs differed.
I met guys who either didn't have any heart for the Lord, or guys who would say that they loved God, but there wasn't much evidence of the Lord working through their hearts. They were either really judgmental towards others (icky!) or indifferent. To me, either one of those qualities was a major turn-off.
The thing is, when you invite the Lord into your heart, your entire life changes. I believe that kindness and boldness are fruits of the Spirit of God living within us. So, if you're meeting guys who say they love God, but don't have kind hearts or don't live boldly and unashamed of Him, then maybe they're just talkin' the talk without walkin' the walk ;)
Dating and relationships had brought so much deep pain into my life that it took everything in me to keep putting myself out there. I was tired of the whole thing and frightened. I really felt like it might just not be in the cards for me.
Since I wasn't meeting anyone who felt right within my soul, I decided to keep my eyes on the Lord. I invited Him in to my heart, to be my all - in - all. My one and only. And the love that He had for me, well it healed my heart. Instead of waiting for the perfect partner, I found refuge in the Lord and focused on becoming the kind of woman who would attract the godly man I was praying for : )
I wanted a man who valued his family and friends, who had a servant's heart, and who loved the Lord with all of his heart, soul, and mind. So, I focused on those things, too! I became the friend I wanted to have. I serve my community. And instead of pursuing or looking for a man, I pursued the Lord.